Dating dilemma of a shy guy

Hi guys. My life is messed up. I feel like a loser when it comes to have girlfriend. Can’t tell you the trauma I go through when I see all my friends going out on date with the girls they meet at bars and pubs. you will usually find me sitting in a corner with my drink and feeling miserable on my self. I am not bad looking, am quite affable and caring in nature too, but because of my shyness I won’t able to approach any girl or talk face - - to-face to them if someone approaches me. I feel really embarrassed before my friends. Some of my friends even tried to arrange a blind date for me, but it never seemed to work out. If I am remember, last time I dated was may be more than three years ago. But it’s high time to try for dating. I need to get rid of my shyness. I don’t want to be labeled as the guy who never gets a date, that’s kind of too upsetting. So guys, tonight I am going out on a date with a girl my friend dated a couple of moths back. It’s a blind date as I have never met this girl. I’m too nervous; this date has to go well. I need to find a girl that I can say I’m dating, that I can say I am going steady with. I’m tired of always being the left out one when my friends and I go out. So every body, please wish me luck!

Are online dating tests reliable

Nowadays, more and more people are finding online dating a remarkable way of gaining new friends, companions, or love mates. As it grows at breakneck speed, the online dating industry has devised a new way of services for their members and even non-members. Many online dating sites are offering the so-called online dating tests. Most of these online dating tests are about personality and compatibility. They range from the simple to most complex questions but all are designed to give people the results that might help them on their online dates. However, even if it gained tremendous popularity, many experts contend that online dating tests are not that reliable. In fact, many psychologists contend that the reliability and efficiency of online dating tests is less than 50%. This means that, when the results of an online dating test concerning compatibility state that the person who tried the test and the person being paired say they are compatible, chances are, only half of it is true. Why Were They Created? Because of the unprecedented growth of online dating and the increasing demand for matchmaking, most of the online dating industry has come up with the concept of online dating tests in order to help with a better match. Hence, different online dating tests have emerged like personality tests and compatibility tests. Psychologists have asserted that when a person tried to access online dating tests and answered some questions, chances are, his or her answers will be affected by many outside factors such as feelings, attitude, mood, and context. This means that there are possibilities wherein a person may have two different answers on one given question if it will be asked on two different situations. For example, if an individual is feeling low or is “heartbroken” by the time he or she tried to answer an online dating test and answered them again on a different mood, chances are, the results may vary. Some psychologists explain that the reason for these discrepancies is that the Internet-based online dating test are only through self-evaluation and are not guided by reliable psychological assessment, which usually are done in clinical conditions. Therefore, for people who are fond of answering online dating tests, there’s no problem on that. The problem arises if it will be the basis of something serious like marriage. Boiled down, these tests can be amusing but it should never be used by people in making decisions about love and relationship.

Why send valentines day flowers

Why you should give your loved one Valentines Day flowers. For hundreds of years Valentines Day has been celebrated by lovers everywhere. Where did this traditions start anyway, and why to we exchange Valentines Day flowers and candies with each other? Well, I have done some searching and I have come across some interesting stories that go along with this tradition. Some of these stories may be true and others may be just what their supposed to be—stories. Here is a short version of what may have really been the beginning of sending Valentines Day flowers on Valentines Day. Why was St. Valentine so important? About 8 hundred years before Valentines Day was established, A man named Claudius was in power in Rome . He felt that marriage was a bad thing because it made poor soldiers out of men. So, he banned marriage from his empire. St. Valentine did not agree with this rule, so he would secretly marry couples that came to him. St. Valentine was caught and soon after he was stoned and then beheaded. Valentine Traditions In Wales wooden love spoons were carved and given as gifts on February 14th. Hearts, keys and keyholes were favorite decorations on the spoons. The decoration meant, "You unlock my heart!" In the Middle Ages, young men and women drew names from a bowl to see who their valentines would be. They would wear these names on their sleeves for one week. To wear your heart on your sleeve now means that it is easy for other people to know how you are feeling. In some countries, a young woman may receive a gift of clothing from a young man. If she keeps the gift, it means she will marry him. Some people used to believe that if a woman saw a robin flying overhead on Valentine's Day, it meant she would marry a sailor. If she saw a sparrow, she would marry a poor man and be very happy. If she saw a goldfinch, she would marry a millionaire. A love seat is a wide chair. It was first made to seat one woman and her wide dress. Later, the love seat or courting seat had two sections, often in an S-shape. In this way, a couple could sit together -- but not too closely! No matter what is true and what is myth, Valentines Day has become big business for the flower, card, and candy companies. Many exist only because of this one day a year. If your and man and have a wife or girlfriend, and you let Valentines Day go by without getting her flowers or candy, your going to be in big trouble. So take my advice, but some effort into your gift too. A carefully chosen V-Day card will take you a long way; take it from a woman who knows however, Valentines Day flowers are still your best bet. If you're lucky enough to have someone who loves you on V-Day, then you should show him or her how much they mean to you. Those who give Valentines Day flowers may be a big money making machine for these companies but, this day allows those sometimes are not always able to show their loved ones how much they care. Valentines Day flowers makes it easier for everyone to prove their love and devotion to the one's that love them.

How to survive and enjoy a blind date

You may not agree, but it seems to me that blind dates are high on the list of things that everyone loves to hate. I have just one question – why? Apparently, there are a number of myths about blind dates that are ruining their reputation. If you’re interested in exploding those myths and learning how to make blind dates productive and even enjoyable, this article is for you. Myth #1: Blind dates are silly because you can just as well meet someone spontaneously. Fact: Let’s face it. If you’re working full time, how many opportunities do you have to suddenly meet a potential dating partner? The majority of married couples will tell you: They did not meet at a club or in college. Someone introduced them. The sooner you accept that a blind date can be the most valuable tool in searching for your soul mate, the sooner your whole outlook on blind dates will take a positive turn – and so will your ability to utilize them. Myth #2: Your first impression on a blind date is usually correct. Go with it. Fact: The area where first impressions count least might just be blind dates. Anyone can be nervous on a first date, or have had an awful day at work. Be honest: Do you show who you really are inside on that first, blind date? Well, neither does your date. Instead, look at it as an icebreaker. Don’t make any decisions if they’re based on mere impressions. Just relax and enjoy the evening as much as possible. Don’t let first impressions get in the way. Myth #3: If you don’t click right away, then you aren’t right for each other Fact: Although many of us expect to click instantly with the person who is right for us, in reality that doesn’t happen too often. Instant connections are rare, and for most people they take several meetings to develop. So if you find that you have a few things in common, or some aspects of your date’s personality appeals to you – that’s enough to go out on a second date. Myth #4: If you don’t feel physically attracted very early on, you never will. Fact: Even though physical attraction is an obvious requisite for marriage, it does not necessarily come instantly. If a man prefers women who are tall, dark and exotic looking, then when he goes out with a petite, blonde, blue-eyed woman it will take him another date or two to appreciate her looks no matter how beautiful she is. The thing is that, when you begin to like a person for who they are, you find yourself appreciating their physical appearance, too. Now that we’ve dealt with the myths, we can get down to some practical advice: How to survive and enjoy (!) a blind date – and how to set the stage for date number two. 1) Don’t spend more than a few minutes talking about your job. Your date wants to see who you are, and if you have the personal qualities they think are important in a future spouse. You are not going to impress the other person by showing them what an accomplished business executive you are. A date is not a job interview. Show the softer side of your personality. 2) Be a good listener. Remember, you want to get to know the person you’re with. Show a genuine interest in your date by picking up on a hobby, interest or project that she mentioned. Let him know that you’re interested in what he’s saying. 3) Keep the conversation light. You do not want to reveal your deepest secrets to someone you hardly know and are not sure if you will ever see again. And they don’t want to hear you pour your heart out over whatever may or not be going wrong in your life. A good rule is to stick to “airplane talk” – the kind of information you would share with a complete stranger who is sitting next to you on a flight. 4) If it’s hard for you to make small talk, practice beforehand. Not everyone has the gift of gab. If you don’t, then practice ahead of time by going over possible topics of conversation. If you’re really shy, then role-play with a friend and walk yourself through that first date. 5) Some ideas for conversation on that first date: These ideas will help you stimulate the kind of conversation you want to have on a first date – conversation that will help you learn a little bit about each other’s values and way of thinking, and will also form the basis for more conversation on the second date. Who do you most admire? How did they inspire you? What has been the most satisfying achievement of your life? Is there something you’ve dreamt about doing for a long time? What is your most treasured possession, and why? 6) Don’t stretch the date out for too long. There is a limit to how much conversation two people can sustain when they go out for the first time. The ideal first date should last between two and two and a half hours, and should give both of you the opportunity to talk in a pleasant and relatively quiet atmosphere; a walk through a beautiful park followed by a good cup of coffee and dessert is great. Men, if you are dealing with social expectations that demand that you take her out for a costly evening, take this advice anyway. Don’t go for a five course meal. And if you’re going to a concert, make sure you have time either before or after to talk with each other. Now that you’ve exploded the myths and gotten some great advice, you can put it to work. Next time you have a blind date, keep all this in mind and see the difference!

Romantic games for couples reinvent the first date

You ever wish you could go back in time and just recreate all of the feelings you had for one another on the first date? Well, I've got a few ideas that might help you grab a hold of that old feeling. The truth is, life can take its toll and sometimes we just grow a little too old with one another and it's pertinent to work hard at bringing our youthful selves back to the forefront. Although our physical selves will continue to grow older, it doesn't mean we have to let that happen on an emotional level as well. Yes, there will be days when things get routine, but we can always vouch for a little excitement from time to time. Don't you think? Now this idea, I consider it to be something that you can only use once in a while. Simply because it too would become a predictable routine if used too frequently. Also, because it's based on timing and money. And since neither of those things are always available at the time we want them to be... you just may have to stash this one away until you find the appropriate time to use it. The Date in the Making... I was thinking a fun thing to do when things get a little stale is spend a few days away from one another. Now, before I go any further, let me say this isn't a bad thing. This is all geared toward adding a little extra fun in the mix, if you're up for a small adventure. The two of you may be getting along famously, but if you're looking for a little more festivity this could be it. Here's how I have it all in mind... You can sit down with your partner and collaborate on which one of you will spend a couple of days away from home. If you have a relative in town this could be the option you take or if money isn't a problem you could spend a couple of days in a hotel. Once you've come to an agreement then it's time to put the rest into action. Okay, so let's say your husband decides to be the one to spend a couple of nights at a hotel. Right now, you might be wondering why he needs to leave the house at all. Well, there is one very important reason why this is a good idea. Once the both of you separate and spend some time apart, functioning without one another for several days makes the anticipation of seeing each other again a lot more exciting. The two of you are able to reconnect with the reality of spending time apart. Things will happen in your day that you'll be able to converse about later, and vice versa. Another reason is that it induces appreciation for the other person. Sometimes we take each other for granted, but when we spend time away from one another, it's a lot easier to see how important that person is to us. But I don't want to get ahead of myself; it will make more sense as I move along, and by the time you're done reading all of this it'll all come together nicely. So, now that you've both decided on the fact that he'll be leaving for a couple of days, the next step is to spend a few days without any initial contact with one another. I consider one day too little, two days to be a fair amount of time, and three days to be just right. But how many days is really up to you in the end. Once you've established that and he's ready to leave, you'll also want to make certain that you have no idea where he is staying. It's important that he keeps this a secret. Now, for emergency purposes, he may at least want to give you the phone number of the hotel he's staying at, so that you'll have a phone number where you can locate him in case an emergency occurs. That way, he's not forced to give you the name of the hotel or the location. Just a phone number you can use to get in touch with him if need be. After that, you can simply stash it away in a safe place and trust yourself not to use it unless it's absolutely necessary. Now that he's gone and the house doesn't feel quite the same without him, consider the following inventive ideas to turn this situation into a one-of-a-kind adventure full of romance and excitement... All of those days you spent alone without him... keep them in mind, because they will work to your advantage. Because on day three it's his job to call you up on the phone, whether it be at work or at home, and ask you out on a date! Once you accept, you can agree on a time, and it's his job to come and pick you up for your date. While he's been away, the house has been quiet, I know. It's no fun. But now you've got something fun to look forward toing together again... and shopping for a new dress! That's right, while he's trying to woo you... you can wow! him. You haven't seen each other for three days and he's planning on taking you some place neither of you have been before. Where? Who knows? That's his choice. But wherever you're going... you should be dressed to impress so that when he shows up at your doorstep he'll be presented with his reward for all of his hard work--A stunning beauty at his side! So it's important to shop for something he's never seen you in. Something you're absolutely sure he'd love. Just like that of any first date. Whether he decides to take you to a new restaurant, walk along the beach, or just an intimate dinner back at his place, this is where all of those important or unimportant events over the next few days have some significance. Chances are both of you have quite a bit to talk about, although it's only been three days you've been away from one another. Three days apart can conjure up a lot of feelings when you love someone and you're used to them being around. During your date, it makes for a good time to express what those feelings are and how much you appreciate one another. There are certain valuable things each of you bring to the table of your marriage, and maybe during the time you were apart... you got to see just how much he offered you on a daily basis. And to add more on top of that... over the last few days, things may have happened in your life that he would normally be there to witness. Well, this time he wasn't. So why not catch him up? It makes for good conversation—similar to the usual date scenario. Once the two of you have come to enjoy the evening together, you've enjoyed the fine wine and nice dinner, and maybe had some chemistry on the dance floor. Aside from that, he's enchanted you with his dashing good looks and charismatic smile. Then once the night comes to full terms, you decide it's time to go. You had a lovely evening and you reconnect on the way back home. At least home is where you think you're going, until he invites you back to his place (the hotel). You accept. At the hotel, the two of you talk for several more hours and at some point find that old familiar chemistry drawing the two of you close once again. So you decide to stay that night at his place. Hold on, before I go any further. Let's rewind... The two of you are getting along well. Everything is going smoothly. On the way home he invites you back to his place. You decline. He takes the bittersweet rejection smoothly. He drops you off at your house and walks you up to the door. "I had a nice time tonight." "I did too," he says, and with slight apprehension he leans in to kiss you (he knows he can't resist. The laws of attraction have been drawing him in all night). "I'd invite you in for a cup of coffee..." (We all know what that means!) "Sure. Coffee sounds great," he says and follows you inside. Now of course the chance of either of you saying or doing any of that is slim to none, unless you're role-playing, but that sure was a heck of a lot of fun to write. I couldn't resist. I was on a roll! No but seriously, I wrote all of that for a reason. Obviously you are reinventing the first date. One in which you get to choose your own adventure. The idea of the hotel cannot only be used as a way for the two of you to spend three days apart, but also as an exciting incentive if you want that one-night-stand appeal with your husband--by going back to "his place" which was the importance behind you having no knowledge of where he was staying. If you have no knowledge of where he's staying, it's all a complete mystery, and the suspense of that can add a lot of fun to an already adventurous night. However, maybe he'll be homesick and want to head home that night, hence the alternate ending above. The fun of it is that a lot of it is such a wild card. Both of you have surprises to look forward to and the beauty of reestablishing intimacy in a new way while you choose your own adventure!

So you got their phone number...now what

You meet a nice guy or girl and you hit it off. You got their phone number but how long should you wait before giving them a call? If you’ve seen the movie Swingers, you know what I’m talking about. Let’s look at some of the possible scenarios you may find yourself in: Call Right Away (within the first half-hour) How you see it: Just making sure they got home safely; or you just really enjoyed their company and you wanted to talk some more How they see it: I just talked to this person 30 minutes ago…what else could they want to talk about? Call 3-6 Days Later How you see it: Didn’t want to seem too desperate and/or wanted them to spend a few days thinking about why you weren’t calling. How they see it: They didn’t call because they were trying to look cool; what do they look like again? Call 7+ Days Later How you see it: Been busy and haven’t gotten around to it…maybe the other person will want me more if I show them how little I care. How they see it: Who are you? The truth is, if you meet someone for the first time, how likely are they to remember you after a week? Now add drinks into the equation and you’re lucky if they remember you the next day. Call the next day if you want to be safe, wait two days if you enjoy living on the edge.